


We're Gonna Be Okay.

by scxlias



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst, Codominance, Fix-It, M/M, Negative Thoughts, Post Episode s5 ep13, like for real, someone please help the mccall pack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-24
Updated: 2016-01-24
Packaged: 2018-05-15 21:21:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,935
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5800573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scxlias/pseuds/scxlias
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He tried to kill Scott. </p><p>When he thinks of it, he doesn’t blame Scott for not wanting him around. </p><p>Liam doesn’t sleep that night, tosses and turns until the sheets are hopelessly tangled around his ankles, decides to do nothing about it, stares at the ceiling until his alarm goes off and his eyes burn from not blinking enough.</p>
            </blockquote>





	We're Gonna Be Okay.

**Author's Note:**

> I couldn't stand this thing not being resolved, so I resolved it. 
> 
> On tumblr @ scxlias and in star wars hell @ jxdistormpilot.
> 
> This is dedicated to Emily the needy asshole (aka kitsunequeen or stilesbansheequeen on tumblr).

Liam’s still processing it. The fact that Scott died. 

It’s not supposed to work that way. In his mind, Scott, he’s invincible. He’s the alpha. the _true alpha_. Scott’s not vulnerable like the rest of them. He always lives, he comes out on top, he saves everyone.

Scott’s not supposed to die. 

Liam played a big part in Scott dying. 

He’s still processing it. 

_You didn’t see it. You didn’t see the look in his eyes when he came at me._

Liam stops listening in on Scott and Stiles’ conversation after that. He darts out the front door, making sure it slams loudly so that everyone knows he’s gone. Out of the way. Not getting involved. 

Not doing anything.

He’d just fuck it up anyway right? 

All he ever does is fuck things up. 

He let Hayden die, then lost her to Theo, he needed Brett to help him protect Mason at Sinema, he couldn’t take control of his shift for months. 

He tried to kill Scott. 

When he thinks of it, he doesn’t blame Scott for not wanting him around. 

Liam doesn’t sleep that night, tosses and turns until the sheets are hopelessly tangled around his ankles, decides to do nothing about it, stares at the ceiling until his alarm goes off and his eyes burn from not blinking enough. 

He doesn’t hear from Scott the next day or the next. 

He starts patching things up with Hayden, but he stumbles and falls when he reaches the mile wide rift between them, created by Hayden’s alliance with Theo, and the fraying remains of Liam’s connection to Scott. 

He thinks that’s about par for the course. He doesn’t get nice things. 

The boy so filled with rage he can hardly control himself does not get to keep relationships that matter. He doesn’t deserve it.

He’s shocked he hasn’t lost Mason yet. 

Mason deserves better than a psychotic best friend he needs to babysit all the time. 

Liam thinks its just a matter of time before Mason realizes and he’s back to square one. 

No one but himself. A lone wolf.

Fitting.

He doesn’t really have a pack anymore, does he?. 

Mason comes to him some indeterminate amount of time later (had it really been almost two days already?) with news about a blind alpha and a beast and Theo’s plans to find them, information brought to him by Corey.

_Just a matter of time. I’m already losing him._

Liam fumbles for a response and reluctantly agrees to go to Scott’s with Mason, his hands shaking as he thinks of confronting his alpha again.

_Can I even call Scott that anymore? Do you get to stay pack once you try to kill the alpha? I think I’d be dead in any other pack._

_Shut up and be glad it was Scott, Dunbar. You’re lucky you’re not dead, dumbass._

Liam tries to stop thinking, but he ends up just feeling sort of numb everywhere. 

He thinks he might prefer that to the constant feeling of fear coursing through him, the fear that this will be it, that this will be the straw that breaks the camel’s back, that this fuck up will be the one he can’t fix.

_Have I already hit that point though?_

_Shut up._

_Stop thinking._

Liam stops thinking.

He welcomes the numb feeling this time, doesn’t question it. 

It hasn’t faded by the time they get to the McCall house.

Mason does all the talking. 

Halfway through the conversation, Liam is still hovering awkwardly at the edge of the room, out of the way, not in danger of screwing up again. Scott notices, Liam knows he does. 

He wishes he didn’t. 

“Hey, Kira, Mason, can I get a second with Liam?”

The human and the kitsune nod and Scott stands, beaming at them, that smile of his that spreads a warm feeling through your whole body because you know you made Scott happy. 

_He’ll never look at you like that again. You fucked that up too, just like you fuck up every other good thing you get._

_Shut up._

_Stop thinking._

He welcomes the numb feeling. 

Scott leads Liam to his room and sits on the edge of the bed, patting the spot next to him.

Liam crosses his arms over his chest, hugging himself, and stands firmly in place by the doorway.

_This is it, Dunbar. He’s finally gonna do it. He must’ve gotten tired of you and your mistakes. You’re done for. He’s gonna kick you out of the pack. Have fun being a lone wolf. Omega. Pitiful status._

_Pitiful._

_Like you._

_Shut up._

_Stop thinking._

_Pitiful._

Liam wishes the numb feeling would come back. 

“Something on your mind, Liam?”

_Pitiful excuse for a beta. Trying to hurt your own alpha because you can’t control yourself. Disgusting._

_“_ Nothing.” He hopes Scott doesn’t notice the way his hands are shaking. “What do you want to talk to me about?”

 _“_ Look, Liam, I know a lot of stuff has been going on, and with Hayden and everything, its been a lot for you. Its been a lot for everyone, and we’re all on different pages here and we’ve got to set some things straight.”

_He’s gonna kick you out of the pack, dumbass._

_“_ Oh?”

“I wanted to talk to you about… about the night in the library, and the pack. And you.” Scott’s voice is steady. Calm. So is is heartbeat. 

_Told you so._

“Okay. Is there… you want… anything specific?” Liam’s voice is shaky. Not right. So is his heartbeat. 

“Your place in this pack.”

_Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. No, no, no, no, no, no, no._

_Oh, yes. You’ll be dead in a week. Against all this? On your own? As an omega? Please. You’ll never survive._

“I… y…yeah, Okay, yeah, that’s… okay. Okay. I…” 

_This is it. This is when he tells you he doesn’t want you._

_This is when he tells you how sad you are._

_Weak._

_Pathetic._

_Disgusting._

_Stupid._

_Disgraceful._

_Animal._

_Monster._

_You had to have seen this coming. Throwing your little temper-tantrums couldn’t go on without consequences forever. Can’t even get a handle on the voices in his head._

_Little angry wolf._

_All on his own._

_Throwing tantrums like a child._

_All on his own._

_You’re going to be all on your own._

_“_ Liam? Liam!”

Scott’s there to catch him when it feels like his knees are going to give out. He wonders why Scott does it. He doesn’t deserve it. He doesn’t deserve an alpha that _cares_  about him. 

But still, Scott wraps strong arms around him and holds him close as he drags him over to the bed. 

“Liam. _Liam._ What’s happening? What’s wrong, pup?”

Liam whines at the nickname. It’s not… Scott shouldn’t be acting so nicely to him.

_All on your own little wolf._

_Angry._

_Little._

_Wolf._

_Pathetic._

_Shut up. Stop thinking._

_Disgrace to your pack._

_Monstrous little thing._

_SHUT UP!_

“Liam, come on, what’s wrong?”

Scott’s voice is too gentle, too… nice, and Liam can hardly take it. Before the panic takes over again, he shoves his way out of Scott’s arms and stands again, his own arms wrapped protectively  around himself. 

“Just get it over with, Scott,” he mutters, looking up at Scott with eyes that are shining for entirely un-supernatural reasons. 

“What?”

“Just do it!” Liam shouts, claws bursting from his fingertips. “Just spit it out. My place in this pack. Its non-existent now, isn’t it? You want me gone? Good. Got it. Bye. No need to drag this out. Just tell me you want to get rid of me.” 

Liam doesn’t wait for Scott to respond, just turns around and heads for the door, head ducked to try to hide the fact that he’s crying, _fucking crying_ , like some little kid. He finds his way suddenly blocked by a slamming door. 

The sound shocks him so much he jumps, eyes flashing in shock. 

“What?” he snaps, rounding on Scott. “Are there terms and conditions too? Not allowed within a hundred feet of the pack at any time? Not allowed to attempt to make contact with any of them? Trust me, I know how restraining orders work, Scott. The Devonford coach made sure I did. No need to explain. Let me out.”

Liam words are angry, but his voice… his voice cracks and wavers and he’s so, so close to losing it. All he wants is to get out of this damn house and away from the people who don’t want him anymore, more people who don’t want him anymore and…

_You brought this on yourself you little trainwreck._

_SHUT UP!_

He slams a fist against the door near Scott’s hand, letting out a noise halfway between a sob and a scream. “Let me out!”

 _“Liam!_  Look at me!” Scott’s voice snaps him out of his own head. “Liam, kid, I’m not kicking you out of the pack.”

Liam balks, stumbling back a step. “What? You’re funny. Let me out.”

“Not joking, pup. I wouldn’t do that to you.” Scott goes to the bed and sits again. Liam, as much as he wants to, doesn’t bolt. “Look. What you did was nowhere near okay. And nothing like that can ever happen again. Understood?” Liam nods once. “But, Liam, you’re just a kid. You’re still learning some things and with the supermoon and your I.E.D., I understand how it happened. I know it wasn’t entirely you up there that night,” he says quietly, tapping the side of his head.

Liam’s breathing is still erratic, his thoughts jumbled, mind running too fast to keep up with a voice that sounds too much like his biological father’s screaming at him in his head. 

“Liam, tell me you understand. You’re still my beta. You’re still pack. You’re still mine, pup.”

Liam snaps. 

He expects he’ll lose it, start wolfing out and throwing punches, fighting like he usually does when he gets overwhelmed, but he doesn’t. 

This time, when he snaps, its not a clean, angry break. Its a heart-wrenching sob and shuddering gasps as he _shatters_. 

Like he always is, Scott is there to catch him. 

Scott wraps strong arms around him and pulls him close, surrounding him with the smell of cedar and pine and something just a little sweet and pack and _Scott_ , and Liam stops trying to hold back the tears welling in his eyes.

“I’m sorry, Scott,” he gasps, words muffled because his face is pressed into his alpha’s chest. “I’m… I’m so fucking sorry, I fucked up so bad, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. I didn’t want to… to…” Liam’s breath is hiccuping and he’s shaking and he feels absolutely pathetic, but Scott says nothing. “I shouldn’t have hurt you and I shouldn’t have left you for… for dead after that and I shouldn’t have… I should’ve trusted you and I should’ve helped you, and I should’ve been there for Hayden instead of hurting you and I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

Scott strokes one hand down Liam’s back and makes this soft rumbling noise deep in his chest, his other hand clamping firmly on the back of Liam’s neck, blunt nails digging into his skin in a way that makes his knees weak. 

“ _Alpha,”_ Liam’s voice comes out as a high pitched whine and his face heats up, embarrassed. 

“Its okay. I’ve got you, pup. I forgive you. Okay? It wasn’t okay, it won’t ever be okay, but I forgive you, and we’re gonna work past this, okay? We’re gonna be okay.”

Liam’s knees almost give out again, and like always, Scott is there to catch him.


End file.
